Just finished watching the fault in our stars.. Such a cute romantic film but I cried half way through it..
today i saw a leak of purple over the sunset
and i thought of how you would’ve loved it.
i wiped away a faint smile,
because for a second i could feel your warmth beside me
but i couldn’t get too comfortable with this illusion
because i knew that i would soon be cold again
with an empty space to my side that you used to fill up.
today i could have sworn i saw you
out driving on the backroads
trying to clear my mind
but it was just another truck
the same kind you used to parade me around in
and now if i see a flash of red in my rear view
i often believe for an instance that it’s you.
today i remembered when i used to mean something to you
i recalled your “i miss you”s, your “forever”s,
the way you traced your fingers along my skin like i was silk
and you were capable of ruining me but would never dare
harm something so beautiful, so precious.
i remembered how it felt to be held by you,
and the way your voice and your touch echoed for days after you left
until the next time i’d once again be wrapped up in you.
today i reminded myself that it did get better
that losing you did not kill me
and that i hadn’t spoken to you in almost a year,
and that was just the way it was supposed to be.
i reminded myself that you were a passing tide,
that i was in control of my own oceans,
and that there were plenty more where you came from.
thoughts on you 1 year later (via gwegg)